Local Jackass

Pictured here is the Toronto Maple Leafs season. Just a smouldering mess.

There’s so much to say, but that’s for another day. It’s just not going to be the same without you, and I sincerely hope you one day write a book that I’ll read with great interest.

All these people wearing those “anti-social social club” hoodies, thinking they’re being cool because they’re advertising the fact they’re not well socially adjusted. I think it’s lame, but whatever. You do you.

But, did you know that’s a massive corporate owned brand, just leeching your money from you? It’s owned by Marquee Brands, since 2022 and also controls brands such as Ben Sherman, Body Glove, Dakine, Istoner, Totes, Martha Stewart, and others.

Also, the CEO makes a measly $10+ Million/year, so that’s cool. Keep buying the shirts bro. Neil will have this 3rd yacht soon.

When you’re a Christian Conservative, and you demand that the pope steps down because he’s too Liberal, because your orange god told you so, right before posting a picture of himself as god.

Definitely none of that “thou shall not take thy lord’s name in vain” or “thou shalt not have any gods before me”, or any of that shit. Not that I believe in this bullshit, but damn – when you’re so confused yourself you just do whatever the orange man says.

Definitely not a cult.

Thank goodness Zuckerberg’s Facebook and Musk’s “X” is bringing it back. I couldn’t think of two other tech bros who love racism more than those fucks. Of course, “relearn.org” is little more than thinly veiled white christian nationalism. The Catholic Church is little more than a racist terrorist organization at this point.

Don’t believe me? Then why isn’t the church denouncing all of these organizations? They couldn’t give fuck as long as people keep giving them money.

Have you bought anything made by Brooks Brothers, Eddie Bauer, Reebok, Champion in the past 6 or 7 years and thought “this isn’t anywhere as good as it used to be”? There’s a reason for that, and it’s completely planned – of course, by yet another venture capital parasite. It’s a $20 billion company that doesn’t design or manufacture anything, they simply rent the logo out to the cheapest bidder. Quality control is right out the window – it’s little more than a logo stapled to a royalty agreement.

The company is called Authentic Brands Group. Their playbook is to wait for a beloved brand to hit financial trouble, buy the intellectual property, the name, logo, and trademarks. Strip out the designers, factory workers, & quality control, then license the brand name to third-party companies who actually make and sell everything. ABG just sits back and collects royalty checks not giving a rats ass about what is or isn’t actually produced.

ABG’s own IPO filing was shockingly transparent about the whole plan : “We generally do not design or manufacture the products associated with our brands and therefore have more limited control over such products’ quality”. They call themselves “brand guardians” but what they really guard is the trademark. Not the stitching, the materials, or the people who made the thing worth buying in the first place.

Here’s what happens after ABG “saves” a brand. Brooks Brothers was founded in 1818 and dressed 40 presidents. ABG bought it out of bankruptcy in 2020 and launched a cheap diffusion line at Macy’s that reviewers called “a little bit shabby.” Eddie Bauer was bought by ABG in 2021 and just filed its third bankruptcy in February 2026 with all 174 stores closing. Forever 21 was bought out of bankruptcy in 2020 and went bankrupt again in 2025 losing over $400 million in three years and closing all 350 U.S. stores.

ABG doesn’t need the stores to survive. When an operating partner goes bankrupt, ABG still owns the brand. They just find another licensee. The workers all lose their jobs. ABG loses nothing.

And ABG isn’t the only company doing this. Here’s who owns what so you can make informed choices:

Authentic Brands Group: Aéropostale, Arrow, Barneys New York, Billabong, Brooks Brothers, Champion, DC Shoes, Dockers, Eddie Bauer, Element, Forever 21, Frederick’s of Hollywood, Frye, Greg Norman, Guess (pending), Hunter Boots, Izod, Jones New York, Juicy Couture, Lucky Brand, Nautica, Nine West, Prince, Quiksilver, Reebok, Rockport, Roxy, RVCA, Sperry, Spyder, Tapout, Ted Baker, Van Heusen, Vince, Volcom

WHP Global: Toys “R” Us, Babies “R” Us, Rag & Bone, Vera Wang, G-Star, Express, Bonobos, Joe’s Jeans, Anne Klein, Joseph Abboud, Isaac Mizrahi, Warners, Lotto, Lands’ End

Marquee Brands: Martha Stewart, Laura Ashley, Sur La Table, Emeril Lagasse, America’s Test Kitchen, BCBGMAXAZRIA, BCBG, Ben Sherman, Bruno Magli, Anti Social Social Club, Totes, Isotoner, Destination Maternity, Motherhood, A Pea in the Pod, Stance, Dakine, Body Glove

Same playbook everywhere. Buy the name. Gut the product. Collect the rent. That’s capitalism, baby.

I’ve said for years now that the French know how to stage a fucking protest.